Friday, December 05, 2008

And so it had been a year.... since I gave birth to my little bundle of joy.
And to celebrate her birthday, the entire family (minus the dad cos he was outstationed in Tokyo) went to dinner at a thai restaurant, and that was after the early morning celebration with the grandparents.

One day prior to her birthday, mommy dearest (that's me) together with 3 other colleagues whom one brought her 7 years old daughter along, lugged my heavy luggage (because travelling with baby dictates it!) and crossed the customs in Indonesia so that baby may enjoy the beautiful beach and kampong style living there.

it was no doubt tiring especially since i had the baby on my arms and 2 bags of luggage. But i think the experience has taught baby some stuff. She got to experience the ferry ride and get to experience the beautiful sandy beaches, she saw the waves.... and now that she sees it on the tv, she would flag her arms excitedly as if to say i have been there! So the pain had been worth it.

I have also been very blessed to have the colleagues who helped out with caring for the baby so that i can steal time off to shower or to eat my dinner hastily.

We came back on her birthday itself so that daddy who came back that day could celebrate it with her. How could her birthday be complete without daddy rite?!

Motherhood has changed me. For one, I think i have become stronger, emotionally, physically.. mentally. Who would have thought me who couldn't even lift the airpot to the sink could actually find the strength to carry baby in one arm, sling one bag across the shoulders and drag the luggage bag to Bintan?

I also think having a baby requires the right set of mind. I have seen too many that "retreat" back into their shell when they realise having a baby is not easy and tries to push baby to someone else to care for him/her.

although I wish sometimes that I am a SAHM so that i may watch her grow up, the fact that the job gives me the extra to bring home so that i can buy toys, clothes and bring her overseas also gives me the satisfaction of being a mother who can provide for her.

For the past 2 weeks I have had loads of fun caring for her and honestly its not easy. I totally understand why my mother had problems running after her since now she's learning to walk. For the past week, i have been doing without lunch because there simply was no time to go buy/cook for myself. But the joy of looking after her is seeing her face light up when she hits a milestone.

I guess I will stop working if i am going to be having a no. 2 because that would mean i need time to look after no. 2 + no. 1. The irony of that is that with no. 2 i would need more $$. But i doubt my parents can find the energy to help me take care of another one.

That being said... i do not know when i will be having a no. 2